12
Juin
10

SoulSaver

Couldn’t write this past week. Running on an empty tank. No writing fuel on hand. Mixed emotions: fear, sadness, anger.

Facing reality? Giving in? Dealing with the facts? Didn’t know which direction to seize. For a few days, my mind went numb. My power went off. Out of order I was. Pain was taking control over. Like a dictature.

For the sake of survival, I rode my bike. For that, I can always find strength. Hiding inside my new kit, I felt physically powerful again.

Controlling those aching leg muscles that seem to otherwise act like they don’t care about me. Doing their own thing. Like they’re getting a better deal playing for an other team.

Pedal, pedal, pedal.

Freezing up my brain cells and my emotions. Up and down. Heading forward. Like a clock. No energy to spare for anyone else. Keeping it all to myself. Soul searching.

“Solo is for the soul” @caribbeancwby Exactly!

Muscles-ligaments- tendons- nerves. A complex machine that makes me nuts most of the time. But somehow, when I’m able to find the perfect cadence, I’m in peace with it all. Reconciliation. Like an old friend that you haven’t seen for years. One that you once took for granted. Feels good to be reunited, to catch up. It just flows.

Pedal, pedal, pedal.

My lifesaver.

My soulsaver.

Mari-jo


3 Responses to “SoulSaver”


  1. 12 juin 2010 à 9:01

    Marijo,
    Thanks for the inspiration to ride today. Riding Nemo is meditation and a way to heal for me. Sometimes, I just go where ever Nemo takes me. She is now all cleaned and polished waiting for me in my kitchen. Sometimes I feel afraid to venture out, but once I’m out, and let my body get into a rhythm, I feel closer to my creator. Have a truly blessed day. Swedie arrives at the builder the 18th, so I should have a new addition to my kitchen to keep Nemo company.
    Rickie

  2. 12 juin 2010 à 11:00

    Beautiful…..I think all of us riders knows exactly how you feel about what the bike can do. Stay strong, my friend.

    Darryl

  3. 13 juin 2010 à 2:43

    Very nice upgrade to your blog site – I like it very much – and your banner graphic picture is a road I would love to ride very much!
    It takes strong and secure people to be able to share their demons, and you are one of them. Keep riding when you can and keep these inspiring stories coming.


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