What do you say to a friend that just lost the love of his life?

I’m usually not bad with words, juggling from French to English with ease. But yesterday, at Nathalie’s funeral, I was speechless. After 14 years of dealing with cancer, she lost her battle. 14 YEARS. What a fighter!  Astonishing inner strength. Ups and downs. Fully living the good times.

A smile that stays with you forever. Eyes so vivid and full of life that you keep telling yourself that this cannot really be happening.  Not now. Not her. 46. She was only 46!!

Like some of you said; too young. Wayyyyyy too young.

So again, what do you say to a friend that just lost the love of his life? And to his two boys, who are quickly becoming strong young men?

During her last week at the hospital, Charles sent me an email:  “she must have completed 7 Tour de France in 7 days!” he wrote. It says it all.

What comforts me a tiny bit is that I know how “rock-solid” Charles is. That guy, on a windy nasty kinda day, could pull you for hours without showing any weakness. A big chainring, powerful  cycling machine. And of course, les boys, like Charles calls them, are just like their dad… and their mom.

Nathalie, our hero.

Mari-jo



Up here, you just never really know when cycling season ends. Your last ride might be as late as November or as early as October. For that reason, instead of feeling sorry for myself and complain about the cold, the rain, the darkness of such depressing fall weather, I put on my running shoes, and head for the trails with my beloved Quick!

In my mind, they are my trails. Apart from a few deer, lots of squirrels, a very busy fox, I just never encounter any human being. Oh, just for the record, I know there are bears but luckily, I just never saw any… Touching wood as I’m typing!

Up and down, right and left
Switchbacks.
Everything but boring.
Jumping a creek, avoiding a rock, trying not to slip.
It’s all about making instant decisions. No time for indecision.
Always thinking about your next step.

Rocks, branches, mud, leaves.
Living in the moment.
Clearing your mind.
Feeling the oxygen steaming down your legs and feeding your brain
Looking up a sec to enjoy the view
Surrounded by trees, waterfalls and mountains
How can you feel anything but fresh and alive?

So, whatever the season, it’s all about being in motion.
Pedal, walk, run, swim, hike, jump, slide…just move!!

When there’s movement
There’s life
Walking, running, pedaling
Road, paths, trails
Please don’t be scared
Just follow me
I’ll show you the way

Morning fog, sunshine, fresh air
Striking surroundings
Rain, snow and ice
Exploring the boundaries
Life in the fast lane
Fighting the elements
Please don’t be scared
Just take my hand
Let me be your leader
I’ll show you the way

But yet another day
Another challenging journey
Facing adversity
But this time, a total different ball game
No movement involved
Wounded
I could fake happiness
But I lost my spark
It’s all just a blur

Stuck in a body that isn’t mine
I can’t reach; I’m lost at sea
Even if I see the land
I fear I won’t make it
The unknown, you know…
Please give me your hand
And show me the way
Tell me I will heal, I promise I’ll never let go

Mari-jo

We see an unknown territory
As a potential new loop
A recently paved road
As velvet under our wheels
A steep hill
As an intense short interval
A mountain
As a epic challenge

We see injuries
As time away from our passion
Health problems
As our worst enemy

Cyclists
We view the world in a different way
Because we are indeed
An exceptional breed!

Mari-jo

 Every single morning

A few easy steps being followed

A plain routine?

Certainly not

More like a ritual

A moment of pure delight

Water whistling in the background

The grinder destroying the beans into tiny pieces

A few scoops gently delivered into the French Press

And may the magic begin

A transformation

A combination of aromas

A few minutes and then…

Time’s up!

The dark potion ready for consumption

The first sip

Aaaaah, the enjoyment of the mysterious brew

Such a delight!

Sleepy head coming back to life

Tons of new ideas jumping around

Armed to face another battle

Ready for another day.

Mari-jo

Yellows, oranges and reds

The colourful twist of Mother Nature

Rain, wind and chilly temperatures

Everyone gathers inside

Homemade soup, fireplaces and fluffy blankets

The soothing effect of a warm infusion

Tea, coffee, what is it gonna be?

Looking back at those summer days

 Struggling to stay in the moment

Overlooking what’s coming next

Knowing that with the power of nature

The leaves will for an instant be free

Until they land and peacefully wait for the end.

Mari-jo

For some reason, I’ve been avoiding this post. I’ve tried several times in the past 2 weeks to sit down and write about  the 24h of Tremblant, but everything I wrote faded away as I hit the delete button each time. Mixed emotions. A weekend of ups and downs, highs and lows. Maybe a mirror of how I really feel and what I’m going through.

Everybody at work asked me how it went so I’ve been re-living those 24 hours like twenty times already. Wanna move forward now and turn the page. So this morning, I’m taking one final shot at it. I’ll see where it brings me. Too heavy a burden.

It all started on that Friday morning. After a terrible rainy and cold week, the sun finally found its way back. Phew! What a relief! Pat asked me if I wanted to go for a bike ride with the wonderful Phil Liggett, the voice of cycling, Lance Armstrong’s guest for The Tour de Lance. I met Mr. Liggett at last year’s edition of the TdL and even if I was lucky enough to have my picture taken with LA, meeting Phil was without a doubt, the highlight of that day! A delightful gentleman, easy to talk to and ooooh, so funny to listen to!

So when Pat asked me if I wanted to ride with Phil, my first reaction was:

“Of course I want to, are you kidding?! Such a treat, such a privilege, wouldn’t miss that for the world!”

But then, my brain suddenly kicked in and reminded my guts that it wasn’t as simple as that: I’ve been saving my back and my sacro-iliac joint for the last month (no hills, no intervals, no pushing big gears, no sprints, no real fun on the bike) just to be able to ride a few hours, pain free, if possible(!), during our 24h. And now, silly me, I was ready to screw it all up for a ride with a sport commentator…

Ok, let me get some things straight here, just to keep you in the loop (thanks GT, I learned that expression from you, hihi!):

1. Phil Liggett is not just any sport commentator; he’s the most colourful cyclist journalist, a real life legend!
2. I can’t go on group rides anymore because of all my injuries (if I push too hard, then I end up paying for it for a few days).
3. I use the word injuries but the truth is that I’m struggling with a wicked health issue. Still can’t talk openly about it, as you can see.
4. And yes, that health issue is disturbing every aspect of my life and it’s preventing me from being the cyclist I once was. Very upsetting, as you can imagine.

Let’s go back to last Friday. I first declined Pat’s offer. But he wasn’t gonna take no for an answer…

-         Common, we’ll just go for 20kms with them and then come back. I really want to ask Phil for an interview for VéloPresse (Pat’s cycling magazine, first edition coming out next spring). I got way too much work to do anyway (finishing sales for SkiPresse magazine). (Yeah, Pat is a busy guy!)

-         20kms, that’s all I can do. So ok, I’m in!

Long story short:

Yes, I got to ride my bike with Phil. Lucky me, someone got a flat along the way which took for ever to change. So there I was, on the side of the road, chatting with Mr Liggett  about getting old and cycling, travelling, my dog Quick and his passion for birds. Felt surreal!

As soon as my back started aching, I swallowed my pride and told Pat I had to leave the group, turn and head back to the car.

Of course I was disappointed, upset, mad and even humiliated. But that negative state of mind wouldn’t ease the pain.  I knew that going back was the right thing to do. I still had a 24h to attend to the next morning! (Btw, Mr Liggett even wrote a Tweet about the ride: “Our short ride turned out to be over very quickly; we did 40kms at an average speed of 40.64kph. I didn’t do that when I was racing!” )

Phil told Pat that he would be delighted to meet us at his hotel, the Quintessence, for     an interview. We had a date set up for 4:30pm. We showed up at 4:30 sharp. We spent a little more than an hour in his luxurious Q room, listening to  this wonderful man, talking passionately, remembering when he was just a 15 year old kid discovering cycling and how he first got into journalism. Oh, and stories about birds, lions in Africa and pictures of kangaroos in NZ!!

Leaving the room, I felt honored and privileged. Quality time with Mr Liggett, wow!

After that, I finally got to meet and chat to Debbie, a friend of Pat’s, who’s been doing the TdL for the past 3 years. Another lovely encounter!

Next was the launching of the 24h at the resto-bar le Shack, where I met Lyne Bessette, another long time friend of Pat’s! We did not stick around too long (I really can’t stand shouting in people’s ears because of loud music!!), went home and prepared our bags for the next morning, setting up the alarm at 6:30 for the big day!

Aaah, the big day, remember?  The one I said was filled with mix emotions… Well instead of writing about it, I’m taking the easy way out: here’s the link to my Flickr album, specially made for the event (some of you have already seen it). They say that a picture says it all so enjoy!

Et voilà: http://www.flickr.com/photos/marijolamarche/sets/72157624832468989/ 

Mari-jo

Although I don’t have to, I always get up before 7am. Quiet. Peaceful. Serene. The birds are signing,  the squirrels are running around the deck.

Daily worries put a side for 2 days, like a mini vacation! Perfect time for writing. Being productive while the rest of the world is sleeping. Very satisfying!

Saturday also  calls for sunshine.  It’s just the way it’s supposed to be. A reward for those who work all week long. Let them have some fun, pelezzzz!

And what would Saturday be without a bike ride? It’s an absolute must. A no brainer. Whether you’re training for your next century or your next race, riding solo, with friends or in a local club, you expect to putt in some serious miles.

You may be mentally drained from your job, you wouldn’t miss your Saturday morning ride in a million years. 8 am and ready to sweat, struggle, attack and  counter attack. You’re all there, sharp as a knife.

Seriously, what would your life be without your Saturday morning bike ride?

Mari-jo

I get up this morning and all I can see is fog. Big thick fog. I know it’s usually followed by blue sky but I can’t see any blue just yet. I’ve completed day 3 off the bike. 3 long days. Feels like an eternity. Like when you first fall in love with someone and you don’t see your new love for 1 full day… Yep, an eternity. The only good thing about it is that by staying off the bike, I’ve got less laundry to do!

Repeating the key word in my mind: temporary.

The last few days have been pretty rough on me.  My sacro-iliac joint decided, again, that she’s had enough pedaling for the summer and has called for a break. I say again because she does that little trick of hers every 2 months or so. She had the decency to give me a few signs before quitting, but like any passionate cyclist, I pretended not to understand her words. You know what a good dose of endorphins do to you, right? Makes your brain dizzy. Makes the pain in your quads disappear. Makes you happy. And makes you crave for more!

So lately, I’ve added a few extra intervals on the big chain ring, preparing for my 24hour coming up in September. Well, it was one too many I guess. I was just having fun with my heart. I could hear my gluteus and back screaming but the fun I was having with my heart made me ignore the rest. And since my muscles, because of some other serious issue, can never fully recover, I’m now paying for that lack of self control.

My daily drill has been pretty boring: ice, rest, avoid walking, lay on back, no sitting at the computer for more than 30 minutes at a time, no lifting, and of course no biking. Repeat for 2 to 15 days (!!). That recommendation would make a couch potato joyful but makes me more on down side. Imagine:  no bike, no computer time. Makes any sane girl go nuts!

Now, after day 3, it’s time for me to get back on the bike and slowly turn the legs. No big chain ring. No resistance training. No intervals. No big fun. Just turn those legs. Easy spin. Gotta play smart if I want to come back strong. Pedaling with my brain, not with my guts. 30 to 45 minute spin, not more than that. Self control, for once.

Gotta stick by those rules for a couple of days. And in the best case scenario, at the end of this week, I’ll get to change those rather boring rules and have some fun again!

Mari-jo

Cancer. What a terrible word. No matter how you look at it, it comes with bad news. Followed by a lot of suffering. And tears. So, I’m asking myself: why wasn’t cancer created for bad people, the ones who commit violent crimes or who intentionally cause pain to others? You know, the evil kind.

It would be their payback, their ultimate punishment. That would make sense. In French we called that concept “Le retour du balancier”. Unfortunately, it wasn’t planned that way.

It just doesn’t make sense.

Cancer hits just about anyone. No discrimination. No matter how old or young you are, what colour your skin is, rich or poor, healthy or sick, an athlete or a couch potato, good or bad, successful business man or a looser… You’re a target, so watch out! I know, I know, some people are more at risk than others… Some, with their reckless lifestyle, are almost calling for it!

But what about kids? Those innocent little children who just want to play outside with their friends and instead, are stuck in their hospital beds, struggling to stay alive?

Like I said, it just doesn’t make sense. Injustice.

What can I do? How can I help? Pedal, pedal, pedal. Of course!

So, for them, starting at noon on Saturday September 11^th, I will be at the race track for the first edition of Tremblant’s 24h of cycling. In teams of 6 to 12 cyclists, we will all be pedaling for those courageous kids trying to beat cancer.

Donations will go to the Cedars Cancer Institute and also to the Tremblant Foundation (underprivileged children).

Along with Pat (@coachpatwells), Charles and other friends, we will be Team SkiPresse-VéloPresse. We’ll ride in the performance section so we’ll be trying to complete as many laps as we can. The course is a little over 4kms, so a lot of laps are expected during those 24 hours!!

If you want to help me, I’m trying to raise 250$.  Hopefully, I will exceed that amount! I already raised 170$ in the first 2 days so…A few more 10$ and I’m there! Oh and guys, it’s Canadian money, hehe! (**Make sure to check the daily  update at the bottom of this page.)

Here is the link to my page ( look for Marie-jo Lamarche): http://velodonation.24htremblant.com/Pages/Participants/Participant.aspx?id=200

Come and cheer, I’ll be the girl with the white-silver bike and the white helmet!

***UPDATE; I’m now up to 380 $!!

Thanks to my Twitter Friends for their donations! @13aspen @debzuck @catherineJCook @rickierainwater @raceG206

Thank you also to my brother, my father in law, my friend and massage therapist Katia.

THANK YOU!!

Mari-jo(@marijolamarche)